


call me when you're high

by pladicus



Series: call me [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Actress!Clarke, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Alternate Universe - College/University, Band Fic, Drinking, Drugs, F/F, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hurt, Musician!Lexa, Singer!Lexa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-09-20 01:00:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9468440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pladicus/pseuds/pladicus
Summary: "Do you know how fucking depressing it is that I enjoy talking to you more when you're not sober? At least then you're not a coward."In which Clarke can only confess her feelings to Lexa when she's high.orLexa's band records unreleased songs chronicling Clexa's relationship.(title from Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High? by Arctic Monkeys)





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, guys! This is just an idea that's been in my head for a while. Basically, Clarke gets high often and Lexa's band records songs written by Lexa chronicling her and Clarke's relationship, but she doesn't release them. 
> 
> I want to finish at least Move Along before I jump into this project, so no updates for this anytime soon. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Clarke's eyes were bloodshot, and it broke Lexa's heart. 

 

"You're so pretty," Clarke murmured, tracing Lexa's lips with her thumb. 

 

"Thank you," Lexa said, bringing her lips to Clarke's. The blonde smiled against Lexa's lips and eagerly responded, and when it seemed like it was progressing further, Lexa pulled away. "I'm not sleeping with you when you're like this, Clarke."

 

The blonde leaned back on her elbows and pouted. Her eyes seemed to become an impossible shade of blue whenever she got high, and Lexa wasn't sure if she should admire the color or be scared for Clarke. "But, baby, I love you."

 

Lexa visibly swallowed and forced a smile on her face. She should be happy. She should. She and Clarke had been sleeping together for years, and they'd been friends longer than that. But Clarke was a coward who could only admit her feelings when she was high, and Lexa hated that she only heard these words when Clarke wouldn't be able to remember what they did or said. "I love you, too, Clarke."

 

Clarke grinned, and Lexa felt her heart beat a little faster. Everyone knew that Clarke was beautiful inside and out, so why did she feel the need to get high all the time? 

 

Clarke sat up only to pull Lexa back down on top of her, smashing their lips together. Lexa gave in for a while, but then tensed when Clarke tried to lift her shirt and shot up from the bed completely. 

 

“Lexa—”

 

“Just get some sleep, Clarke,” Lexa said, forcing the smile on her face. “You’re going to need it when you go to work tomorrow.”

 

Clarke stared at Lexa for a long time, and the brunette felt uncomfortable under her gaze.

 

“Okay,” Clarke said after a while. “Come lay down with me.”

 

“I’m not going to have sex with you, Clarke.”

 

“No sex. I promise,” Clarke said, and Lexa gave in, because how could she not? Clarke had her wrapped around her little finger, and she knew it.

 

Lexa crawled into bed and pulled the blankets on top of them, and laid down next to Clarke, the two of them facing each other. They simply stared at each other for a while, and Lexa tucked a strand of hair behind Clarke’s ear, keeping her hand on Clarke’s cheek. “You know that you don’t need to get high all the time, right?”

 

Clarke shook her head. “No.”

 

Lexa’s heart broke, and she pulled Clarke in for a hug, letting the blonde’s head bury itself into her chest. 

 


	2. Temporary Fix

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huzzah! The first chapter is finally here! 
> 
> Also, for anyone waiting on chapters for Move Along, I'm about halfway done with the latest chapter, and hope to post it within the next week or two. School has been a real pain in the ass lately, and I've got many deadlines since it's less than a month and a half from the end of the semester, but I'll be posting more chapters during the summer.
> 
> Thank you all for being so patient with me xx

The first time Lexa Woods met Clarke Griffin was when Lexa got stung by twenty-five wasps after accidentally stepping over a log that housed a wasp nest. Clarke laughed at her for a good five minutes before helping Lexa up and helping her back to her campground to administer the necessary first aid. It was the first and last time they saw each other that trip, as Lexa had just arrived when Clarke was due to leave with her father that afternoon.

And it was purely coincidental that they happened to go to the same high school when Lexa transferred in her junior year. Her dad had gotten a job in DC in the West Wing, and she and Clarke bonded over their hatred for all politicians, even though Clarke’s mother had been the democratic senator for California at the time. 

Lexa was often at the Griffin’s her last two years of high school, and it had become painfully obvious for the only Griffin in the house with eyes, Jake, that Lexa had completely fallen in love with Clarke by the time they were eighteen, and when discouraged by Clarke’s aloofness, Jake would merely laugh and mess up Lexa’s hair. 

“She’ll come around, Lexa. I wouldn’t want anyone else for her,” Jake promised. 

And then he died their senior year of high school, taking a literal bullet for his wife during an attempted assassination. He never made it to their hospital.

Jake’s death killed Clarke. She cried herself to sleep in Lexa’s arms the night of his death, and never shed another tear after that, turning into a cold, emotionless person when it came to loving other people and relationships. Senator Griffin threw herself into politics, and it was Clarke’s turn to spend most of her days at Lexa’s house. That is, when she wasn’t off getting drunk. 

Abby and Clarke’s relationship became strained, and by the time she was leaving for college with Lexa, it was the first time the two Griffins had spoken to each other in three months, and that was only to say goodbye. Needless to say, it would take them nearly a decade before they reconciled and salvaged their familial relationship.

 

 

 

“This room’s tiny,” Clarke said, scrunching her nose as she walked in with her suitcases.

“It’s a dorm, duh,” Lexa told her, walking in after her with her own suitcases. Her parents were walking in moments later with boxes in their arms. 

“You girls excited?” Lexa’s mom, Sherri, asked as she placed her box on one of the desks.

“Yeah,” Lexa answered, turning to Clarke. “Left or right?”

“Left,” Clarke called out, knowing Lexa wouldn't care either way. She rolled her suitcases under the loft bed, and immediately unzipped them.

“Right, so we’ll bring the four other boxes from the car, while you girls start unpacking. I’d like you girls to be all settled in before we leave. Sounds good?” Martin, Lexa’s dad, asked the two of them. 

“Yep, thanks, dad,” Lexa smiled, opening her suitcase to reveal clothes she’d already placed clothes hangers in. 

“Alright, we’ll be back in a bit,” Sherri told them before she and her husband left the room. 

Lexa grabbed her clothes and stood up to hang them when she saw Clarke staring at an old picture of her and jake on her phone. Lexa put her clothes down for a moment and walked up to give Clarke a hug from behind. “You need a minute?”

Clarke locked her phone and put it aside, shaking her head. “I’m good. Let’s just get our stuff sorted so we can find a party to go to.”

Lexa gave Clarke one last squeeze before the two of them separated to get their clothes sorted. Lexa had her speaker in her suitcase, and quickly set it up to play Rumours from her phone, Clarke’s all-time favorite album. And maybe, just maybe, Clarke had smiled a little more that day.

 

 

 

Lexa met Raven Reyes outside her physics classroom two weeks into her freshman year. Well, technically, she’d met her at the kickoff party before the semester started, but Raven was drunk off her ass, so that didn’t count. 

“Hey, Lexa, right?” Raven asked after she hung up the flier on the bulletin board. 

“Yeah, and you’re Raven?”

“Yep,” the Latina grinned. “Your friend Clarke is real wild.”

Lexa grimaced slightly at that, because she absolutely hated it when Clarke got piss drunk at parties. She wasn’t trying to control the girl’s fun, but Lexa knew that Clarke’s excessive drinking was because she wanted to forget, and that made Lexa worry. “Yep.”

Raven could sense that Lexa wasn’t too happy about that, so she decided to change the subject. “So, can you sing?”

Lexa was taken about by the question. “What?”

“Can you sing, or play an instrument?” Raven asked.

“I can play a couple of instruments, and my singing is okay, I guess,” Lexa told her. “Why?”

Raven answered by handing Lexa a flyer. “We’re having an audition for a lead singer. Well, not me. My girlfriend and a few of our friends are forming a band and they needed a lead singer, preferably someone who can play at least one instrument. You should check it out.”

“I don’t know. I’m not too big on that kind of stuff,” Lexa told her. 

“You should try. I mean, if you don’t want to do it, nobody’s going to force you, but you might make some friends out of it,” Raven told her, then checked her watch. “I’ve got to go to class now, but it’s Thursday at four. Give it a chance, and if you know of anyone that might be interested, tell them about it.”

Raven left after they exchanged goodbyes, and Lexa took that flier with her to her physics classroom, sitting through class for a few hours before she left with the flier in hand. 

It was mid-afternoon when Lexa unlocked the door to her dorm. Clarke had her dad's old record player (an original from the 80s) playing The Who, while the blonde herself was in shorts and a tank top, lying on the ground with a large grin on her face, one she'd sported only a handful of times since Jake died in May. 

"What's got you all smiley?' Lexa asked as she shut the door behind her. 

"I just had the best orgasm of my life," Clarke told her, and whatever smile Lexa had on her face was replaced with a frown. 

"Please tell me you didn't have sex on my bed," Lexa said, disguising how envious she was on the inside. She wasn't too worried about Clarke getting into a relationship, because her agenda for the past several months has been to drink, fuck, avoid her mom, and sleep with a heavy heart next to Lexa. 

"No, ew. I don't want to bring anyone back here," Clarke said, sitting up and scrunching her nose in that little way Lexa always thought was adorable. "She went down on me in the art studio, then I ditched her and got takeout."

"How classy," Lexa deadpanned, dropping her backpack on her desk chair. She pulled out the flier while Clarke got them some aloe water from the mini fridge they had in their dorm, and combined with the Chinese takeout Clarke had gotten, they began eating lunch on the floor. "So, I ran into Raven today."

Clarke quirked a brow in confusion. "Raven?"

"You know, the girl you were having a keg stand competition with two weeks ago at the kickoff party," Lexa reminded her, and Clarke's eyes lit up in recognition. 

"Oh, yeah. She can really hold her booze."

"Yeah, anyway, I ran into her today, and she gave me this," Lexa said, showing Clarke the flyer. 

"An audition for a band?" Clarke asked after reading the words. "I didn't know you were into that kind of thing."

"I'm not, but Raven shoved the flyer in my hands and wouldn't take no for an answer," Lexa told her, putting the flyer on the ground between them so that she could occupy her hands with food. "You're a better singer than me, anyway. I thought you might like it."

"Nope, not interested," Clarke told her as she took a bite of her spring roll. "You should go for it, though."

"Me?" Lexa asked in confusion. "Why?"

"You know how to play, like, a billion different instruments and you sing pretty well. Why not?"

Lexa silently chewed on her food for several moments. "Will you come with me to the audition?"

"If you want me to, yeah," Clarke said. "By the way, your mom called."

Lexa groaned and face-palmed, knowing that her mother had embarrassed her yet again. "What did she say this time?"

Clarke was amused by Lexa's embarrassment. "Don't forget to fold your underwear."

Clarke began laughing uncontrollably, not even stopping when Lexa hit her with a pillow. 

 

 

 

"You made it!" Raven exclaimed, smiling when she saw that Clarke had also tagged along. "And you brought Clarke. Are you going to be auditioning, too?"

"I'm just here for moral support," Clarke told her, making herself comfortable by sitting on one of the amps in the recording studio. "Whose place is this?"

"Mine," a girl holding a bass answered. 

"Oh, yeah, introductions!" Raven said. "Lexa, Clarke, this is my girlfriend Anya. She's on bass."

"Hey," the girl on bass, Anya, greeted.

"Octavia is on drums and her brother Bellamy is lead guitar," Raven told them, pointing to the brunette on drums and her brother, who was waving as he drank from a water bottle. "And last, but not least, that's Lincoln, Octavia's boyfriend. He's a rhythm guitarist."

"Hello," Lincoln politely greeted, and Lexa and Clarke greeted him back.

"So, can you play any instruments?" Anya asked.

Clarke snorted at Anya's question, then started laughing. 

"What's so funny?' Octavia asked her. 

"Asking Lexa if she can play an instrument is like asking if water is wet," Clarke told them. "She can play everything."

"Not _everything_ ," Lexa said with a roll of her eyes.

"Okay, the didgeridoo doesn't fucking count."

"The what?" Anya asked. 

"Exactly," Clarke said.

"It's a brass aerophone from the indigenous people of Australia," Lexa explained.

"A what?" Anya repeated. 

"It's a giant woodwind, basically," Clarke translated. 

Raven, Anya, Octavia, Lincoln, and Bellamy all exchanged looks before they turned back to Clarke and Lexa. 

"You two are weird as fuck," Octavia said. "So, what are you gonna sing for us?"

"Sympathy For The Devil," Lexa said, and Anya was surprised by the choice. 

"Alright, we can back you up with that. The mic on the stand is all yours," Anya told her, nodding to the others to get ready. Clarke hopped off the amp and decided to join Raven on the beanbag chairs giving them front row seats to the audition. 

"One, two, one, two, three," Octavia counted, starting them off with the beat. 

Clarke gave Lexa an encouraging smile and nudged Raven, mouthing 'watch this,' just as Lexa began singing. 

Lexa's performance and voice had captivated them all, and Anya nearly slipped up when her jaw dropped at Lexa. Lexa was nervous at first, but eventually gave in and pulled Clarke up to dance with her, making up stupid dances to the beat of the song. Clarke pulled Raven up and the three of them danced as Lexa sang. 

When the song came to an end, Clarke gave Lexa a big hug, calming her down for the post-show anxiety that was sure to hit, and they pulled away when Raven yelled, "Where the fuck did that come from?"

"I told you she was great," Clarke said, wrapping an arm around Lexa. Lexa was a little selfish and accepted the touch of friendly affection that was calming her beating heart and speeding it at the same time. 

"Raven, how many other people are waiting outside?" Anya asked her girlfriend. 

"Two, I think. Why?"

"Tell them to get lost. We just found our lead singer," Anya said, pulling off her bass to place it on the stand. 

Lea hesitated. "I don't know, actually."

"What!" Lexa was startled when she heard the shout from Octavia. For a tiny girl, she had a loud voice. "Why?"

"I'm not too big on the whole publicity thing."

At that, Anya snorted. "Calm down, Mick Jagger. You're not going to gain fangirls overnight."

Lexa furrowed her brows. "It said that you guys were serious musicians on the flier, though."

"We are, but everybody starts at the bottom. We have to write our songs first and build a fanbase."

"What about a record deal?"

"That comes later," Bellamy spoke. "Anya toured with Panic! At The Disco this summer, so she knows what she's saying. She's got friends in the music industry."

"You toured with Panic!?" Clarke asked. 

"Yep, for his North America tour."

Clarke turned to Lexa and flicked her forehead. 

"Ow! What was that for?" Lexa whined, rubbing her forehead. 

"You're joining this band. End of discussion."

"I thought you said this was my choice."

"Not when I could potentially meet Brendan Urie."

"Wow, thanks, Clarke. Glad to know I'm only here to serve you," Lexa said with a roll of her eyes. 

"So, does this mean you're in the band?" Octavia asked. 

"Yep!" Clarke answered for her.

"Great! We can celebrate, then."

 

 

 

"Clarke, what's your last name?" Octavia asked several weeks later, as a friend of Raven, Niylah, set up the area where they would be filming a cover of Sympathy For The Devil.

Lexa could feel Clarke stiffen next to her. "Why?"

"I was just going to add you as a friend on Facebook, calm down," Octavia answered when she noticed the change in Clarke's demeanor. The others, except for Niylah, who couldn't hear anything due to testing out the audio, were intrigued when Clarke became all hostile. "If you don't want me to, that's cool, too."

Clarke let out a sigh, knowing that she was being a little unreasonable. "It's Griffin."

"As in Senator Griffin?" Anya asked. 

"The one and only," Clarke said, bitterly. 

There was a pause, and then Anya said, "I fucking hate your mom."

"That makes two of us," Clarke told her, and that was the last they spoke about Abby around Clarke for years to come.

 

 

 

After filming the video and wrapping up, Niylah approached Clarke, who was texting her history partner about their project. The others were setting up the band's Youtube channel. "Clarke, right?"

Clarke looked up from her phone and gave Niylah a once-over. Hot body, not too bad. "Yep, and you're Mika?"

"Niylah," she corrected, and Clarke smiled on the inside. Too easy. "I was wondering if you had any interest in acting."

Clarke raised a brow. "Acting?"

"Yeah. I'm a film major, and I'm doing a my first feature that I'm hoping to submit to a few film festivals. You just seem to fit the part of the lead very well," Niylah told her.

"Look, if this is about using my name, you can forget about it," Clarke told her, doing a complete one-eighty.

Niylah furrowed her brows. "Your name? What?"

"I literally just told everyone before filming that my mom's the democratic senator for California, so if it's about that, I'm not interested."

"Uh, I was testing the audio, so I didn't hear you at all, and frankly, I don't give a shit if your mom's the senator," Niylah said. "I just want to make a good film, and I'd rather not take the shitty route and start as a lowly PA running around like a headless chicken all the time. We're having auditions next week. You interested?"

Clarke pursed her lips to think about it, and she saw Lexa laughing with her bandmates at something on the computer. Clarke turned her attention back to Niylah. "Okay, fine."

"Cool," Niylah said, unlocking her phone and handing it over to Clarke. "Put your number in so that I can send you a link to the scene you'll be auditioning for."

Clarke took Niylah's phone and in under a minute, her number was saved in Niylah's contacts. She then quickly sent herself a text before handing the blonde back her phone. 

"Nice. I'll text you the link once I get home," Niylah promised, then turned to pull Bellamy and Lincoln by the back of their shirts. "You're helping me carry my equipment to my car."

The three of them managed one trip and they said goodbye to Niylah, who promised to send the video by the end of the week. 

"So, what did you guys decide to name the band?" Clarke asked, taking Bellamy's seat.

"The Coalition," Lexa answered. "The more important question, though, is which picture should be our profile picture?"

 

 

 

"Scripts are weird," Lexa said, handing it back to Clarke, who was waiting to be called for her audition. Lexa saw how nervous she was, so she intertwined their fingers, and Clarke immediately gripped Lexa's hand as if her life depended on it. 

"I don't even know why I'm this nervous. I haven't even done a school play before," Clarke mumbled. "What if I'm awful, Lex?"

"You'll be fine, Clarke," Lexa said. "Besides, it's a student film. It's not going to determine the rest of your life, you know."

The door opened to the audition room, and out walked an auditionee. Niylah came out of the room later and looked at Clarke. "Clarke, you're up."

Lexa squeezed Clarke's hand once more before letting go, watching the blonde stand up. "Good luck. You'll do great."

Clarke drew strength from Lexa's encouraging smile and followed Niylah into the audition room. Niylah took her place behind a table next to two other people.

"Clarke, this is my cinematographer, Andy, and my DP, Jess," Niylah introduced, and Clarke politely shook their hands. "Alright, just take a seat on the chair and give us a minute to set up the recording. I'll be reading for Sam's role."

Clarke did as she was told and waited for them to hit record, following instructions by saying her name before beginning the scene. It made Clarke nervous at the end when they held straight faces with no expression, and after the recording ended, Niylah began speaking again.

"Alright, thank you. There's also one more thing you should know about the role," Niylah said. "Your character is gay, and there's a sex scene that you'll have to do with another woman. If that isn't something you feel comfortable doing, we might reassign you to a different role. Of course, you have the choice of dropping out of the movie altogether, but we'd prefer you say something now instead of the day before we start shooting."

"I'm fine with it," Clarke told her, even though she knew it would probably piss off her mom. Actually, that was the _exact_ reason she was going to do it. "It's not going to bother me."

"Okay," Niylah smiled. "Then we'll contact you by the end of next week about your audition. Thanks for coming, Clarke."

"Thank you for the audition," Clarke told them, shaking hands before exiting the room. Niylah walked after her to call the next person up.

Lexa saw Clarke exit the audition room and immediately stood up. "Hey, how'd it go?"

Clarke waited until the door shut behind Niylah before she started speaking. "Honest to God, that might have been the scariest shit I've done in a long time. They didn't smile at all. Well, except for Niylah at the end, but that wasn't for my audition."

"Clarke, I'm sure you did great," Lexa said with soft eyes, taking Clarke's hand in hers to squeeze it. 

Clarke smiled at Lexa, then felt her phone buzz in her pocket. She let go of Lexa's hand to retrieve it, and the brunette would be lying if she said she didn't feel a little bit disappointed. 

"Raven said Anya's neighbor is throwing a party. Wanna go?" Clarke asked, looking up from her phone. 

Lexa hesitated. She didn't like going to parties, as she was more of a small group type of person, but she knew that if she let Clarke go alone, she was going to get drunk and might overdose on alcohol. Clarke came very close to that the week after graduation, and Lexa had never been more scared in her entire life. "Sure. What time?"

"We've got enough to get back and get ready, then head over," Clarke told her as she typed a quick reply to Raven.

 

 

 

Lexa knew that last drink was a terrible mistake, because she was certainly hallucinating the sex eyes that Clarke was shooting her. 

"Lexa."

The brunette turned to Anya, who narrowed her eyes at the younger girl. "Huh?"

"Have I been talking to a wall for the last five minutes?" Anya asked, taking the drink from Lexa's hands and sniffing it, then wrinkled her nose. "Ew. Who mixed this for you?"

"Lincoln."

Anya poured Lexa's drink in the sink, then began mixing her a real drink. "Don't let him make any drinks for you. He's a pacifist."

"So?"

"He makes shitty drinks," Anya told her, shoving the cup back in Lexa's hands.

"What's this?"

"A gin rickey. People won't be able to smell the booze on you," Anya told her, then mimicked Lexa's position and leaned back on the kitchen island to stare at the crowd in her neighbor's living room. "So, who were you eyeing?"

"No one," Lexa said, a bit _too_ quickly.

Anya narrowed her eyes and looked around the room, doing a double take when she saw Clarke staring at Lexa. "Holy shit."

"What?" Lexa asked worriedly.

Anya laughed, then turned to Lexa. "You have a thing for your best friend."

"No, I don't," Lexa quickly denied.

"You're a terrible liar," Anya told her. 

"I don't have a thing for Clarke."

"So, you're just going to ignore those sex eyes she's sending you?" Anya asked. 

"You thought they were sex eyes, too?" Lexa asked, mentally cursing herself when she saw the grin on Anya's face. 

"Yes, and you better rescue her, because that idiot next to her is trying and failing to flirt with her," Anya said, stealing Lexa's drink and giving her a little push. 

Lexa stumbled, a little off-balance because of the alcohol, but managed to reach Clarke across the living room, totally ignoring the guy next to her. "Hey."

"Hi," Clarke said, eyes glassy and a little pink. She was definitely at least a little bit drunk. 

"Come with me?" Lexa asked.

"Yeah," Clarke answered, taking Lexa's outstretched hand. 

 

 

 

Lexa felt her back collide with the wall in the narrow hallway, but she was paying more attention to how Clarke was attacking her neck.

"Jesus fucking Christ," Lexa breathed as Clarke sucked on a particularly sensitive spot.

"It's Clarke, but I'll take that, too," the blonde joked, moving to occupy Lexa's lips with her own. 

Lexa's head was spinning. There was no fucking way this was happening. Not in Lexa's wild imagina— well, actually, this _was_ Lexa's wildest imagination, next to asking Clarke out.

"Fuck, we need a room," Clarke said against Lexa's lips, feeling the brunette grope her ass. 

"Not here," Lexa murmured, pulling out her phone to call a cab. Clarke moved her attention back to Lexa's neck, and the brunette could practically feel Clarke's intention to leave a hickey. Her senses were on overload, and she had barely managed to tell the cab company their address before hanging up. "There's one two minutes away. Let's go."

Lexa pulled Clarke with her towards the front door, ignoring the salute Anya sent her. 

 

 

 

Clarke's eagerness was implied based on how she practically climbed over Lexa to get in the cab, and Lexa uttered UCLA campus to the driver before she lost the ability to speak. 

 

 

 

Lexa felt her heartbeat finally begin to calm after their late night activities, and she turned her head to see Clarke dead tired next to her. 

Lexa swallowed visibly, not realizing the possible consequences of their situation until she'd come down from the adrenaline rush and felt the alcohol leave her system. "Did we just ruin our friendship?"

Clarke opened her eyes to stare at Lexa. "It was just sex, Lexa. We're still friends."

The sound of Lexa's heavy breathing and her swallowing filled the silence of the room. "We've been friends for two years. What made it different this time?"

Clarke doodled on Lexa's bicep with her fingers as the brunette awaited an answer. "I want to sleep for once."

Lexa softened at Clarke's confession. She knew that Clarke would never admit this sober, and she really did crave someone so that she could sleep soundly at night. She had more than once caught Clarke slipping into bed with her after her dad died, and would leave before Lexa woke up whenever they were sleeping at each other's houses. Lexa never called her out for it, fearing that Clarke would go and do something rash to cover up her embarrassment. "You don't need to sleep with me to sleep next to me, Clarke."

The blonde forced a small smile, then turned her back on Lea, leaving herself completely vulnerable to the blonde. Lexa spooned Clarke without a word, and that was the first night since they left for college that Clarke managed to get a good night's sleep. 

 

 

 

Anya opened the door to her apartment, half-asleep and annoyed when she saw who was at her doorstep. "Do you know what time it is?"

Lexa glanced at her phone and held it up for Anya to see. "Six forty-two on Saturday morning."

"Exactly. My girlfriend is in bed, and I really want to enjoy morning sex with her in three hours," Anya said. "What do you want?"

"Let me use the studio," Lexa told her. "I want to write a song."

Begrudgingly, Anya opened the door further and allowed Lexa to step inside. "Didn't you have sex with Clarke last night? Why aren't you in bed with her?"

"Clarke likes to surf on Saturday mornings. She usually leaves at around six-thirty, and today's not an exception," Lexa answered, following Anya to her studio. Anya opened the door for her, and Lexa stepped inside, smiling at Anya. "Thanks. Have fun fucking Raven."

"Oh, I will," Anya promised, reaching to close the door. "It's soundproof both ways, so go at it."

 

 

 

"How long has she been in there?" Raven asked, pulling on her shorts and one of Anya's t-shirts. 

Anya looked to the time on her phone. "About four hours now." 

"Did she eat at all?" Raven asked, grabbing her phone from the charger. 

"I dunno. I didn't hear the door open, and we've been at it for a while. I think she hasn't left since she went in," Anya said, following Raven out of their bedroom. 

"She needs to eat. I'll whip something up and you go make sure she isn't dead in there," Raven told her, pressing a quick kiss to her girlfriend's cheek before making her way to the kitchen. 

Anya sighed, then turned to the studio, quietly opening the door, which wouldn't have mattered anyway, seeing that Lexa was inside the recording booth anyway. She closed the door behind her and listened to the beat that was playing throughout the room, seeing that Lexa hadn't noticed her presence yet, and decided to leave her in the zone.

"Saw your body language and I know how you're feeling  
You look like the kind of girl who's tired of speaking  
Standing with somebody but he doesn't know what you like," Lexa sang.

"You caught my attention, you were looking at me first  
All that I can see's you waking up in my t-shirt  
If you're not hooked on anything right now, I can be your vice

"All you need to know is  
You can call me  
When you're lonely  
When you can't sleep  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You control me  
Even if it's just tonight

"You can call me  
When you feel like  
I'm your good time  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You can own me and we'll call this what you like  
Let me be your good night

"The night is on your lips and I feel like I'm locked in  
There's a million lights, I don't care if they're watching  
Your body is saying everything, I don't have to read your mind

"Feel you on my neck while I'm calling a taxi  
Climbing over me while I climb in the backseat  
Now we're taking off, now we're taking it off tonight."

Anya heard Raven walk in the room with reheated pancakes from the day before, setting them down on the coffee table before leaning on Anya and listening to Lexa sing. 

"All you need to know is  
You can call me  
When you're lonely  
When you can't sleep  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You control me  
Even if it's just tonight

"You can call me  
When you feel like  
I'm your good time  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You can own me and we'll call this what you like  
Let me be your good night."

"Didn't you say Lexa that likes Clarke?" Raven asked Anya, turning to the blonde. "And that they slept together?"

"She does," Anya answered, staring at Lexa. "They did."

"We can roll in the darkness,  
Let me touch you where your heart is  
And if you're feeling the weakness  
Well, I told you, baby, that you can call me  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You can call me," Lexa sang, bursting out that last word.

"You can call me  
When you're lonely  
When you can't sleep  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You control me  
Even if it's just tonight

"You can call me  
When you feel like  
I'm your good time  
I'll be your temporary fix  
You can own me and we'll call this what you like  
Let me be your good night."

The song ended seconds after Lexa stopped singing, and Anya walked to the sound board while Lexa took off her headphones and hung them on the wall, not noticing that Anya and Raven were listening until she stepped out of the recording booth. 

"How much of that did you hear?" Lexa asked, looking between the two of them.

"I was here for the second half," Raven answered, and then Lexa turned to Anya.

"All of it," Anya told her. "Did you really write that in four hours?"

"Two and a half," Lexa corrected, scratching the back of her neck. "I spent the first hour and a half trying to figure out how to use the sound board."

"How long did the lyrics take?" Anya asked. 

Lexa shrugged, looking at her feet. "Ten, maybe fifteen minutes. The rest of the time was figuring out the instrumental, mostly."

"Lexa, look at me," Anya spoke softly. She only continued when the younger girl lifted her head and followed Anya's command. "That's a really fucking good song. You're really talented, Lexa. I know professionals who only dream of achieving what you just did."

Lexa half-smiled at Anya's words. "Thanks."

"Anytime, kid," Anya told her, then patted the soundboard. "So, should I call the others so that they could learn this, too?"

"No."

Anya paused to stare in confusion at Lexa. "No?"

"I didn't write this song for the band, Anya. It's too personal," Lexa told her, taking a firm stance on the argument. 

"If it's so personal, then why did you record it?" Anya asked her.

Raven could feel the tension rising, so she quickly excused herself. "I'm going to go make eggs."

Lexa waited for Raven to leave before answering her bandmate. "I wrote this song for me. It's too personal. I'm not going to destroy Clarke's privacy like that, or mine. I will write another song for the band, but I just want to finish recording this one for myself."

Anya thought about it for a few moments. She wasn't one to butt into people's business, and if Lexa didn't want this song released, then she couldn't force her. "Fine."

Lexa let out a sigh of relief. "Thank y—"

"But," Anya continued, cutting Lexa off. "I want two songs in exchange. If you're going to be using my studio to write about your love life, I need to guarantee that you're still making the band songs top priority. Take it or leave it."

"Deal," Lexa agreed, taking it without a second thought. 

"Good. So, let's get some food in you first, because water isn't going to give you any energy," Anya said, handing the plate of day old pancakes to Lexa. "I'll play back what you recorded and then we can figure out what the song is missing."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Lexa 'writes' about Clarke is Temporary Fix by One Direction.
> 
> If there are any haters out there, I honestly don't care. So many people give them shit because they're a boyband, but their songs are actually really good if you cared enough to listen to them. In fact, I'm warning you now, about a fourth of the songs Lexa writes about Clarke are 1D songs because they fit in so well with the story. 
> 
> But for those of you who are curious, the other artists (so far) include Hozier, Halsey, Lera Lynn, Arctic Monkeys, Bad Suns, Twenty One Pilots, and Ed Sheeran. This may change as I finalize the playlist. 
> 
> I'd like to finish LAF and MA before hopping onto this, so updates may be as slow as once every few weeks, maybe longer.


	3. Here

"So," Lexa began, scratching her fingernail along the burn mark on her desk, facing Clarke, who sat atop her bed. 

"So?" Clarke asked, not taking her eyes off her biology textbook, reading through the section, though she already knew what Lexa was going to say. It had been three nights since the party, and they had somehow managed to stay busy enough to not have time to sit down and talk. Until now.

"About the other night," Lexa said, stealing a glance at Clarke, who by now had left her textbook alone and given Lexa her full attention. Lexa felt small from where she sat, with Clarke towering a good three feet or so because of her loft bed. 

"You mean when we had sex?" Clarke mentioned with a rather blunt attitude. To be fair, she was always kind of like that. Saying things that made her uncomfortable, but  needed to be out in the open anyway.

"Yes," Lexa answered in a small voice. "We need to talk about it."

"What's there to talk about?" Clarke asked with a nonchalant attitude, but Lexa couldn't see that Clarke's anxiety spiked on the inside. She was terrified to death that she'd lose the only other constant in her life. "I may have been drunk, but I still remember us agreeing to stay friends. It was just a one-time thing, right?"

Clarke gave herself a mental slap to the face when she saw Lexa's expression, but the brunette had managed to cover it up well. 

"Right, yeah," Lexa agreed, though not by choice. "Yeah, you're right."

"You already said that," Clarke said with a smile, a little happy, however sadistic it may seem, that Lexa hadn't given up on her, that Lexa loved her enough to stay. Clarke wasn't stupid. She knew Lexa harbored more than friendly feelings towards her, but the way her family broke apart had really screwed over any love she had in another human being. She lived by that one piece of advice she'd gotten on a fortune cookie when she was drunk on the rare occasion that Lexa wasn't with her, and it told her to make sure she could find someone who loved her more than she loved them, because they'd do anything for them. That was easy enough for Clarke, who was incapable of loving anyone, and Lexa already did love Clarke, so it was perfect. Everything worked out for her. Lexa, not so much.

"Yeah," Lexa nodded absentmindedly, spinning in her chair so her back faced Clarke. 

 

 

 

“Alright, I sent it to your email. Did you get it?” Anya asked. 

Lexa was beside her on her laptop, opening the email and waiting for it to download. “Yeah, just give me a second to download it.”

Anya took a sip from her water bottle, and watched Lexa as the file downloaded to her computer. 

“Okay, all set,” Lexa said, saving the song into a file folder that Lexa knew Clarke would never look under.

“Good. So, do you have any song ideas in mind?” Anya asked, setting her water bottle down. “For the band, I mean.”

“Yeah, I’ve got a couple, but they don’t really fit into a genre or a category,” Lexa told her, shutting her laptop. 

Anya furrowed her brows in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I’ve got a couple ideas in mind, but they kind of overlap with pop, rock, hip hop, a little bit of rap. The songs are kind of all over the place.”

Anya raised a brow at the brunette, who’s anxiety had caused her to avoid Anya’s eyes and toy with the hem of her shirt. “You want to rap?”

“Kind of,” Lexa admitted in such a small voice. 

Anya pursed her lips in thought, then shrugged her shoulders. “Alright. Let’s see what you’ve got.”

Lexa hesitated for a moment, then opened her backpack and revealed a leather notebook that she'd bought recently, opening it to reveal an already written song. Lexa grabbed the acoustic from its stand and made sure it was tuned before she started strumming. 

"I'm sorry if I seem uninterested  
Or I'm not listenin' or I'm indifferent  
Truly, I ain't got no business here  
But since my friends are here  
I just came to kick it but really  
I would rather be at home all by myself not in this room  
With people who don't even care about my well-being  
I don't dance, don't ask, I don't need a boyfriend  
So you can go back, please enjoy your party  
I'll be here, somewhere in the corner under clouds of marijuana  
With this boy who's hollering I can hardly hear  
Over this music I don't listen to and I don't wanna get with you  
So tell my friends that I'll be over here  
  
Oh oh oh here oh oh oh here oh oh oh  
I ask myself what am I doing here?  
Oh oh oh here oh oh oh here  
And I can't wait till we can break up outta here."

Anya was quite impressed from the song. It had barely been a week since Lexa wrote Temporary Fix, and by the uneven pages in the journal, she could tell that the girl had managed to write a few more. This girl was on a whole other level. She was made for fame.

"Excuse me if I seem a little unimpressed with this  
An anti-social pessimist but usually I don't mess with this  
And I know you mean only the best and  
Your intentions aren't to bother me  
But honestly I'd rather be  
Somewhere with my people we can kick it and just listen  
To some music with the message (like we usually do)  
And we'll discuss our big dreams  
How we plan to take over the planet  
So pardon my manners, I hope you'll understand it  
That I'll be here  
Not there in the kitchen with the girl  
Who's always gossiping about her friends  
So tell them I'll be here  
Right next to the boy who's throwing up 'cause  
He can't take what's in his cup no more  
Oh God why am I here?  
  
Oh oh oh here oh oh oh here oh oh oh  
I ask myself what am I doing here?  
Oh oh oh here oh oh oh here  
And I can't wait till we can break up outta here  
  
Hours later congregating next to the refrigerator  
Some girl's talking 'bout her haters  
She ain't got none  
How did it ever come to this  
I shoulda never come to this  
So holla at me I'll be in the car when you're done  
I'm standoffish, don't want what you're offering  
And I'm done talking  
Awfully sad it had to be that way  
So tell my people when they're ready that I'm ready  
And I'm standing by the TV with my beanie low  
Yo I'll be over here  
  
Oh oh oh here oh oh oh here oh oh oh  
I ask myself what am I doing here?  
Oh oh oh here oh oh oh here  
And I can't wait till we can break up outta here  
  
Oh oh oh oh oh oh  
Oh oh oh oh oh oh."

Lexa let out the last note and finished stemming, then held the acoustic to her chest, looking timidly at Anya. "What do you think?"

Anya paused to think about her wording, and saw Lexa grow anxious by the second. "I don't think that I'll ever manage to hate something that you write, Lexa. You have a true gift, and I don't think you even realize it."

Lexa blushed and ducked her head, too embarrassed by all the praise Anya was giving her. "Thanks."

"Plus, I thought you were going to rap," Anya said.

"I am, maybe. I've got one written with some rap in it," Lexa told her. 

"What was the song about? The one that you just sang."

"It's called Here, and it's about the first party that I went to. I was a sophomore in high school, and this was before I moved to DC, so I was with my old group of friends in New York," Lexa explained. "I'm not a big partier, as you might have noticed."

"Yeah, no shit," Anya snorted, earning an eye roll from Lexa.

"Anyway, I was just really uncomfortable at this party and did not want to be there at all. My friends were really excited about it because it was their first big high school party, and one of them had gotten his license, so he was being a big show off by driving us all there. Long story short, they all ditched me to get drunk, and I found myself wandering around and some drunk guy from my gym class tried to hit on me, even though it was well-known that I was gay as fuck. I didn't really feel like staying, so I called my mom and had her pick me up."

"Did you tell her that you were going to go to the party beforehand?"

"Yeah, even though my idiot friends were lying to their parents. I just wanted my parents to know where I was in case something happened."

"That was responsible of you," Anya commented, to which Lexa shrugged. "Was she mad when she smelled the booze and weed on you?"

"No, because she knew what was going to go on at a high school party. She's not stupid," Lexa told her. "Besides, I wasn't drinking at that party. I found some food coloring in the pantry and mixed that with water in my cup so that it looked like I had some of the spiked fruit punch."

"Are you still uncomfortable going to parties?" Anya asked.

"It's not that I'm uncomfortable, but more like I'd rather do something else, you know?"

"So, then why do show up? From what Raven's told me, you've been to the kick-off party, and that's the biggest one at the start of the semester."

"I only really go because of Clarke," Lexa admitted. 

"You do know that Clarke doesn't control your life, right?" Anya asked her.

"I know she doesn't, but I'm more uncomfortable leaving her there all by herself," Lexa told her. "I worry about her."

"Clarke's an adult, Lexa. You don't need to babysit her."

"Anya, you don't know her, so please stop talking about her as if you do," Lexa said. Clarke was one subject she could not handle people attacking. 

Anya was surprised at the sudden defensiveness Lexa had taken, but she wasn't one to butt into people's business, so she held her hands up to show defeat. "Alright, I won't."

"Thank you," Lexa said, casting her gaze back to the acoustic in her hands. 

"Did you guys at least talk about what happened when you slept together?" Anya asked. "It's not good if you avoid each other."

"We're not. We talked about it, and agreed that it was a one time thing. We're still friends."

Lexa's tone and manner clearly told Anya that this wasn't what she wanted. It sounded like Lexa pushed aside her own feelings and pretended to go along with that decision. 

"And are you okay with that?" Anya asked, wanting to see how Lexa would answer, though she already had a pretty good idea of what her answer would be.

Lexa swallowed the words she wanted to say. "Yeah."

 

 

 

“Alright, thanks, Niylah,” Clarke said. “Bye.”

Lexa patiently waited for Clarke to hang up the phone before speaking. “Well?”

Clarke hung her head low, and for a moment, Lexa had seriously thought that Clarke hadn’t made it. Of course, in true Clarke fashion, the blonde perked her head up with the widest grin ever. “I got the fucking role!”

“I knew you could do it. Congrats, Clarke,” Lexa said with a happy smile on her face for the blonde. They hugged fiercely before Clarke let go to pull out a Beatles album and play it on the record. Lexa recognized I’m Just Happy To Dance With You playing from the speakers, and Lexa was definitely to dance with a happy, grinning Clarke. Sure, it wasn't the type of relationship she was looking for with Clarke, but it was better to have her as a friend than not at all. 

 

 

 

"Hey, so, you know that song that I wrote last week?" Lexa asked, gathering the attention of her bandmates. Raven was also in the studio, but that was because she was tightening some screws in Octavia's drums. "The one I had you do some backing vocals for?"

"Yeah, Temporary Fix, right?" Bellamy asked, slinging the guitar strap over his shoulder. "Are we going to hear it anytime soon? Start practicing, maybe?"

Lexa took a deep breath, trying to calm the little balloon that was inflating in her chest. "Actually, no."

"What do you mean?" Bellamy asked, confusion evident on his face.

"We're not doing the song. She's got a new one written, and I think it's better," Anya said, gathering the attention of everyone in the room. Lexa mouthed a thank you to Anya, who managed to subtly nod so as not to give anything away. "Show them, Lexa."

Lexa nodded her head and grabbed the acoustic, making sure it was in tune before she started playing. Octavia had picked up a beat as Lexa went into the second verse, and Anya, having heard this song before and worked on it with Lexa, played around with some chords for the bass. Lincoln and Bellamy watched, seeing as Lexa was playing what they would eventually learn, and Raven was enjoying the whole show. 

"Not that there was anything wrong with the first song," Bellamy said after Lexa and the others stopped playing, "but I like this one much more."

"I told you," Anya said, wagging a finger at him, to which Bellamy rolled his eyes.

"You want to learn the chords?" Lexa asked, and Bellamy and Lincoln eagerly nodded. Lincoln and Bellamy grabbed the their electric guitars and joined Lexa so that she could teach them, while Anya and Octavia discussed the best beat for the song. 

"Alright, so you've got rhythm, and it goes kind of like this," Lexa said, showing him the chords and watching as Lincoln played them back to her. It went on for about fifteen minutes, and when he got it down, Lexa moved to Bellamy and taught him the other chords. Raven had long left by the time Lexa was done teaching Bellamy, and the group decided to start practicing the song. Eventually, they got a good flow going, bringing Lexa's song to life. Of course, there were a few mistakes here and there, and the changing of some chords and beats, but it had otherwise been a pretty successful band practice. 

Just as they were about to play the song again, a knock on the door gathered their attention, and they all turned to see Raven and Clarke at the door. 

"Mind if we sit and watch?" Raven asked, looking around the room, and feeling a little concerned when Anya clenched her jaw slightly at the sight of Clarke.

"I don't mind," Lexa told them, looking to the others for their approval. In general, they all agreed, so Clarke and Raven took a seat on the bean bag chairs. Lexa saw how Anya was staring at Clarke, and made a point of blocking Clarke from Anya's view to get her point across. Anya rolled her eyes and handed Lexa a microphone before turning up the amps just slightly loud enough for Raven and Clarke to hear the instruments and Lexa's voice.

Octavia counted them off and they began playing the song, with Clarke's eyes shifting to each of the band members in the room, nodding her head to the beat. When the song was over, Clarke and Raven cheered and clapped. 

"Yo, that was dope," Raven told them.

"Yeah, I really liked it," Clarke said. "Have you thought about adding a piano to the song, though?"

"A piano?" Lexa asked, watching as Clarke nodded her head and stood up. 

"Yeah," Clarke said, moving to the keyboard that was next to the sound board. Clarke turned it on and payed around with a few of the setting before playing a few chords. "Something like that, around the part where you were talking about marijuana."

"You can play the piano?" Lincoln asked, clearly surprised. 

"Yeah, I've been classically trained in piano, though I hate playing classical music," Clarke told them, scrunching her face at the thought. "I can only play that and the guitar, though I'm mediocre at best with the guitar."

"Well, let's try it," Lexa said. "Let's start from the beginning, and I'll play around with the piano a little. Thanks, Clarke."

"Yep," the blonde smiled, and went back to sit next to Raven, who'd reached over to the mini fridge and pulled out beers for the two of them.

 

 

 

"So, really, what did you think of the song today?" Lexa asked once it was late at night, both in their respective beds with the lights off. Clarke normally would have been out partying tonight, but she had a test in the morning, and wasn't about to risk her academic career. 

Clarke had been scrolling through her phone, but at Lexa's question, she locked her screen and placed the device under her pillow. She tucked her hand in between her cheek and pillow, and looked across the room at Lexa, who mirrored her position. 

"I really liked it, Lex," Clarke told her. "It was a good song."

"Yeah?" Lexa said softly, as if she couldn't believe the words coming from Clarke's mouth.

"Yeah," Clarke said. "I didn't know you were that uncomfortable at parties. If you don't like them, Lexa, you don't need to show up, you know."

"It's not about parties now, but when I was in high school. It was about my first my party. Do you remember that story?" 

"When you're friends ditched you and you called your mom for a ride?"

Lexa nodded her head in confirmation.

"Are you cool with parties now, then?" Clarke asked. Lexa shrugged at the question, and Clarke lifted her head up to send Lexa a look that meant no nonsense. "Lex, seriously. Do you not want to come to these parties?"

"If I had the choice, no," Lexa answered truthfully. "I'd rather have a group of friends hanging out than go to parties."

"Then why do you come with me if you don't like them?"

Lexa almost felt like Clarke was upset at her answer. "Because you're there, Clarke. You may be a social butterfly, but come on, before you met Raven and Octavia and hung out with them at parties, I was your only friend. I didn't want to leave you alone while you were drunk. Something could have happened to you and I would've blamed myself."

"Do you think that I'm going to kill myself, Lexa?" Clarke asked, her voice barely above a whisper. At the brunette's silence, Clarke continued. "Do you think that I'm going to get alcohol poisoning like I did when I found out my dad died?"

"Go to sleep, Clarke," Lexa said, turning around in her bed to face the wall. It was silent for a few seconds, and eventually, Lexa heard some shuffling and the sound of Clarke's bed sheets moving. Lexa had assumed that Clarke followed her advice, but when she heard a loud thump, Lexa turned to find Clarke standing on the ground, moving to her closet. "Clarke, what are you doing?"

The blonde ignored her and went through her closet, pulling out a dress that Lexa had recognized as her go-to party dress. She stripped out of her pajamas, and Lexa immediately looked away. 

"You have a test tomorrow morning, Clarke. Don't get drunk and risk your grade," Lexa told her, jumping from her loft bed. Clarke had just barely pulled the straps of her dress on once Lexa landed on the ground. The blonde went for her desk lamp and turned it on, illuminating at least some parts of the room. Lexa rolled her eyes when she saw Clarke reach for her makeup bag, so she walked over and firmly held Clarke's wrists, enough to get her attention and look at Lexa, and boy was she pissed. "Stop. Think about this."

Clarke glared at her best friend and yanked her wrists away from the brunette, turning her back on Lexa in favor of applying makeup. Lexa sighed, knowing that she couldn't hold Clarke here and prevent her from going to the party, so she pulled open her drawers and changed into jeans and a t-shirt. She pulled her hair into a ponytail and made sure to grab her keys and phone with some spare cash just in case. Lexa slipped on her sneakers and watched as Clarke got ready, ignoring her presence as she stepped out into the hall. 

 

 

 

Clarke was being an idiot, and she knew it well. It pissed her off and hurt her when she learned that Lexa thought she would kill herself willingly in the event that Lexa wasn't with her at a party, so of course she had to prove her wrong. Her pride was stupid when it showed up at the times she wish it didn't.

She was sober for once, with the exception of two shots she'd taken but that was hardly anything to her, dancing with a guy who was clearly trying to piss off his ex, and that worked for Clarke, because she was trying to piss Lexa off and hurt her like she had hurt Clarke. She was staring at Lexa the whole time, who merely shook her head in disappointment at Clarke's mere presence at the party. 

"Hey, you wanna piss off your ex even more?" Clarke asked the guy she was dancing with. 

"Yeah," he answered.

"Great, pucker up," she told him before tugging at his collar and pressing their lips together. Clarke was cruel for keeping eye contact with Lexa the entire time. 

The guy pulled back, his eyes trailing the exit plan of his ex. "Thanks," he told Clarke, before ditching her to follow the red head. 

Clarke wasn't in the mood to continue dancing. Honestly, she just wanted to crawl into bed right now, but she had to stay at the party to spite Lexa. She walked into the kitchen and knew that Lexa would be hot on her heels. Other than a couple that was sucking face in the corner, they were the only ones in there. 

Clarke turned around and found Lexa not even a few inches from her faces. 

"Clarke," Lexa spoke, but was cut off when Clarke smashed their lips together. She could blame it on the alcohol, blame it on her drunk tendencies. 

 

 

 

"Goddammit," Clarke groaned, snoozing the alarm she'd set on her phone. Lexa was half-asleep next to her, pulling the blanket tighter over her naked body.

"Go to class," Lexa mumbled. "You have a test."

"Ugh," Clarke sounded, not in the mood to take the exam, but she knew that she at least had the opportunity to make up for half the points if she bombed it. Having no shame whatsoever, Clarke jumped from Lexa's loft bed and landed on the ground, shivering at the chill on her naked body. She opened her drawers and pulled out a pair of yoga pants and a sweater, along with undergarments, dressing quickly. 

"Are you done changing?" Lexa asked, apparently more awake than the blonde initially thought. Clarke turned to find the brunette facing the wall.

"You made me orgasm three times last night, Lexa. You can watch me get dressed," Clarke told her, brushing her hair to at least tame the freshly fucked look. "Yes, I'm done changing."

Lexa turned around, hugging her blanked to cover her chest. "I thought this was a one time thing."

"It was, but I don't want to risk getting STDs. Octavia's roommate found out she had chlamydia last week," Clarke mentioned, acting rather nonchalant when she was really freaking out on the inside. Again.

"STIs," Lexa corrected.

"What?" Clarke asked, putting her brush down to bunch her hair into a bun. 

"They're now calling them infections, rather than diseases, hence the initials STI."

"Of course they are," Clarke said with a roll of her eyes, grabbing her toothbrush and toothpaste before walking out of the room. 

Lexa hopped down from her bed and slipped on her running gear. She put up a reminder to change the sheets when she got back, seeing as her professor canceled class for the day. She grabbed some yogurt and and granola cereal, mixing them together before taking a seat at her desk. She typed in her password for her laptop and was immediately greeted by the weekly calendar that she and Clarke had synced their schedules to. Clarke began rehearsals next week, and her schedule filled up quickly. Already, next weekend she had two ten hour shoots to do at the beach, which Lexa guessed would be Clarke's favorite scenes since she loved the water so much. 

Clarke came back into the dorm when Lexa was nearly done with her breakfast. It was awkwardly silent as Clarke grabbed her bag and packed her laptop and notebook. 

"So, you don't want to get STIs," Lexa continued their conversation.

"I don't think anyone does, to be honest," Clarke said zipping up her backpack.

"Are you just going to keep getting drunk and sleep with me?" 

Clarke paused, then turned to face Lexa. "You hate it when I get drunk, right?"

"Yeah," Lexa answered, as if their sort-of fight last night hadn't clarified that. 

"And I hate it when I go to the doctor to test for STDs."

"STIs."

"Whatever," Clarke said with a roll of her eyes. "I start filming next week, and I'm not in the mood to go out every night and find someone new to fuck me."

"Just say what it is that you want, Clarke," Lexa told her, feeling her heart beat increase. "Do you want to be friends with benefits?"

"Yes," Clarke said quietly. They stared at each other in silence, and Clarke nearly jumped out of her skin when her alarm stared blaring. She grabbed her phone and turned the alarm off, then just held her phone in her hand and awkwardly stared at the ground. 

"Okay," Lexa finally said, standing up to toss the empty yogurt cup in the trash. 

Clarke lifted her head up, not believing what she was hearing. Lexa had grabbed her phone and hooked it up to her armband. "What?"

"I said okay," she repeated, plugging one earbud in as she opened up her music app. "You're gonna be late if you don't leave now, though."

Clarke glanced at the time and her eyes widened. "Fuck," she muttered, grabbing her bag and slipping on her shoes before she left the room. 

Lexa stood in the now empty room, pinching the bridge of her nose as if she couldn't believe what she agreed to. She just completely fucked herself over. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapters for MA and LAF are in the works, so don't worry about me abandoning those stories, though I think I'll be updating this one more than I had planned to.


	4. Cardiac Arrest

Filming made Clarke exhausted, if you mix that with school. Most weekends were dedicated to ten-hour shoots or longer, and sometimes she even filmed during the week. The small amount of free time that she had when she wasn't studying or filming was used up on alcohol or sex, sometimes both. Clarke never really left their dorm much because she was exhausted, so she drank and laid her head in Lexa's lap while the brunette was doing her assigned reading for her economics class. Lexa didn't know if she should have been concerned or happy that Clarke didn't go out much anymore. 

"Your fingers feel nice," Clarke murmured, eyes closed as the two of them listened to Etta James playing from the record on Clarke's turntable. Lexa scrolled through a transcript for her English class, and Clarke's head was in her lap, tired and throbbing slightly from how drunk the blonde was. 

"Yeah?" Lexa said, locking her phone and tossing it aside, tired from squinting to read words on the screen. This was why Lexa liked books better. They didn't give her migraines. 

"Mm," Clarke sounded as Lexa massaged Clarke's scalp. "My head is burning and your fingers are nice and cold."

These were the moments Lexa enjoyed that reminded her of the old Clarke, the Clarke that was once full of joy and life, the Clarke who occasionally went to parties and really only wanted to go and binge shows with Lexa. The Clarke who loved goofing around on the piano and purposely sang off-key to distract Lexa's playing. The Clarke that always cut her oranges into seven pieces, even though she knew it would annoy the hell out of Lexa because half of the pieces wouldn't end up being the same size. 

This was the Clarke that she fell in love with, not the shell of the person she pretended to be. 

Lexa's phone buzzed, and for two seconds, she wished that she had the guts to ignore it, but she didn't, and with an annoyed sigh, Lexa unlocked her phone, furrowing her brows as she read and re-read the text. "Holy shit."

"What's wrong?" Clarke asked, opening her eyes to see that Lexa was in shock. "Lex?"

"Anya just got us a gig," Lexa said, unlocking her phone to respond to the group chat.

 

> **Anya** : I'm the greatest. 
> 
> **Anya** : I just got us our first gig.
> 
> **Lexa** : No way. Seriously?
> 
> **Octavia** : fuck yeah! where at?

"Really?" Clarke asked, smiling at Lexa's excited expression. "Congrats, Lex. Where's it going to be?"

"Anya's typing," Lexa told her.

 

> **Anya** : My friend Robbie and his brother Ian own a bar ten min from campus.

"It's at a bar not too far from here," Lexa said. "Some of Anya's friends own it." 

 

> **Anya** : I played them the studio version of Here and they loved it.
> 
> **Bellamy** : Is it a paid gig?
> 
> **Anya** : It's better to explain in person. Are you guys free to come over rn? 

"Anya just invited us to talk about the gig," Lexa said, staring down at Clarke, who'd closed her eyes once more. "You want to tag along?"

"Can we stop for food on the way?" Clarke asked. "From that Vietnamese place with the banh mi sandwiches?"

"Yeah, sure," Lexa told her. "I'll just let them know and we can leave."

 

> **Octavia** : Lincoln is covering someone else's shift, but I'm game. 
> 
> **Bellamy** : Me too. I'll be there in fifteen.
> 
> **Anya** : Lexa?
> 
> **Lexa** : I'll be there, too. Clarke and I are swinging by the Vietnamese sandwich shop. Anyone want something while we're there?
> 
> **Octavia** : chicken banh mi for me!! 
> 
> **Octavia** : with everything on there
> 
> **Bellamy** : Same
> 
> **Anya** : Make it three.
> 
> **Anya** : I meant four. Raven wants some.
> 
> **Lexa** : Cool. Be there in 20ish.

Lexa locked her phone and tapped Clarke's head. "Okay, let's go."

 

 

 

"Wow, Clarke must really be beat," Raven said as she walked into the studio after covering the blonde with a blanket. "She fell asleep almost as soon as she walked in."

"Yeah, acting and school has really taken her energy," Lexa said, only half-lying. Sex drained whatever energy the blonde had after that. 

"I haven't seen her at any parties as of late," Bellamy mentioned. "Not that I go to many in the first place, but my frat brother Zach is a big partier, and he said it was almost like she dropped off the face of the earth."

Lexa shrugged at that, not really sure how to reply to it, so she just changed the subject. "So, the gig?"

"Oh, yeah. Robbie really liked the song, and he offered us a spot next Thursday to play. It's only for half an hour, which isn't too bad. If enough people like us, he might ask us to come back," Anya told them. "I know it's kind of short notice, but they need to fill up the spot quickly."

"Are we getting paid?" Octavia asked. 

"If Thursday is a success, he'll be paying us a hundred bucks," Anya told them. "We can negotiate hours and prices if we're in the clear. A half hour means that we'll have to play about seven to ten songs, maybe shorten it to six if we stop and talk for a few minutes in the middle of the gig."

"Well, it's a good thing we only know about that many number of songs," Octavia said. "Which ones are we playing?"

 

 

 

 

"Mhm," Clarke sounded, fisting her hand in Lexa's hair, holding it tighter. They'd been making out for several minutes, happening to be in the dorm at the same time when they usually pass each other in the hallway. Clarke's class got out early, and she wasted no time in grabbing Lexa for a makeout session. When the blonde began trailing her hand down to Lexa's zipper, the brunette pulled away, only to have Clarke attach her lips to Lexa's neck.

"I have to leave for class, Clarke," Lexa reminded her in between deep breathes, clenching her eyes shut as Clarke sucked on a sweet spot on the brunette's neck.

"Just a few minutes," the blonde murmured, unbuttoning Lexa's jeans. 

Lexa's phone chimed with a notification, and with much difficulty, the brunette pulled it out of her pocket and glanced at the notification. Fuck.

"What is it?" Clarke asked, detaching her lips from Lexa's body to glance at Lexa's phone. All she needed to do was read the subject line before grinning wildly at Lexa. She snatched the phone from the brunette and placed it on her desk before turning to her best friend. "Class is canceled. You have no excuse not to fuck me."

Lexa's eyes scanned Clarke's face. "Lady luck is on your side everyday, isn't she?" 

Clarke's mischievous grin never left. "Always."

Lexa leaned her face closer to Clarke's, foreheads almost touching, but not quite. She could see the blonde's confidence falter a little, as evidenced by the gulp in Clarke's throat. "What do you want me to do to you, Clarke?"

If you asked Lexa, she wanted a different answer. Hug me, hold me, love me, protect me, save me. Any of those would work. Hell, Lexa would have given up her musical ability to fill the black hole in Clarke's chest. But no, Clarke's answer was one that would destroy their entire connection. 

"Fuck me, Lexa."

 

 

 

Lexa hated their loft beds, and Clarke did, too. It was a mutual agreement between the two of them that they would get apartments off campus after freshman year, because the lack of space was a major issue, and having sex on the floor really killed the mood to sleep when one had to climb up the ladders to get into bed. But, that's what Lexa coerced a half-sleeping Clarke to do, making sure to cover the girl's body. The blonde had been tired for the past two weeks, but the exhaustion really caught up to her that day, and Lexa decided to give Clarke a pass and let her sleep all afternoon. 

She was sure that Clarke was asleep, and it was because that she was asleep that Lexa stayed in the dorm messing around with the guitar. She'd brought it along with her from the East Coast, but never thought she'd get to play it as often as she did in college. As she absently-mindedly strummed, Lexa eyes subconsciously wavered to Clarke, who was knocked out, and would likely not wake up until the morning. This gave Lexa the confidence to write a new song and sing lightly.

"I've been trying to keep my grip, yeah I think I'm over this  
I can hear it now, oh no, oh no-o"

Lexa shut her eyes as she replayed the memory in her mind of the day she agreed to the fuck buddy situation with Clarke.

"Yeah my tongue will let it slip, why’d I do those things I did  
I can taste it now, oh no, oh no-o"

Lexa paused her strumming to write the lyrics down in her journal, then continued strumming.

"I’ll try my best, how much do I invest?  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage in her lips  
I’ll try my best, how much do I invest?  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage when we kiss."

Lexa paused again to write the lyrics down, then started over from the beginning, playing it several times, eyeing Clarke to make sure that she wasn't awake. Sleeping next to her made Lexa hyperaware of the signs that meant the blonde was awake, and at the moment, Clarke seemed to be able to sleep through a fire.

"My innards turn, your eyes, they roll. I’ll be there to take the fall  
I can feel it now, oh no, oh no-o  
Same old story since day one, but I’ve got no place to run  
I can see it now, oh no, oh no-o

"Oh, woah  
High voltage in her lips, they catch me when I slip  
Oh, woah  
High voltage in her lips, they catch me when I slip"

Lexa paused to write notes in the margins about the chords and melody, then continued the song.

"I’ll try my best, how much do I invest?  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage in her lips  
I’ll try my best, how much do I invest?  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage when we kiss  
  
"Oh, woah  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage in her lips  
Oh, woah  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage when we kiss  
I’ll try my best, how much do I invest?  
Like cardiac arrest, high voltage in her lips, I’ll try my best"

 

 

 

"Hip hop or rap?" Bellamy asked Clarke as soon as she joined the Blakes at a cafe for brunch.

"Uh, rock," Clarke answered in return. She glanced behind her to see Lexa rushing in through the door and waved at her to get her attention.

"Hip hop or rap?" Bellamy asked Lexa almost as soon as she took a seat. 

"Both?" Lexa answered unsurely, sharing a look of confusion with Clarke when Bellamy huffed in annoyance.

"You have to pick one," Bellamy told them.

Octavia rolled her eyes at her brother. "We're having a debate about which one is better, and your answers don't satisfy him."

"Why are you so uptight about this? People have different tastes in music," Clarke told him. 

"I know, but we're debating two genres here," he told her.

"Honestly, they're kind of similar," Lexa said. "The all have the same roots, and kind of evolved from each other. I like them both. I don't see why you're making such a big deal out of it."

"He's a baby when it comes to arguments," Octavia mentioned. "It's really a wonder how you're the older one, Bell."

"Shut up," Bellamy muttered, then turned to Lexa. "I'll issue you a challenge."

"Guys, can we eat first?" Clarke groaned. "I'm hungry as fuck."

"Just listen," Bellamy insisted, continuing with Lexa. "If you can write a song that has elements of both hip hop and rap in it, I'll do whatever the hell you want me to do. I'll owe you one."

Lexa thought about his challenge for a moment. "Okay, deal."

"Aren't you going to ask me what my prize would be?"

"Nope," she told him, opening up the menu with a coy smile on her face. "Your ass is grass, Blake."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a filler chapter, but we will see what the band's music style evolves to with Bellamy's challenge. Any guesses? ;)


	5. Screen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not too sure how I like this chapter. Let me know what you think!

Lexa waited for Bellamy to put the headphones down before speaking. "Well?"

"It's a song about cheese," Bellamy said, referring to the track he'd just listened to. It was the two of them inside Anya's studio, waiting for the others to show up. Raven had let them in while Anya was at work, but Bellamy and Lexa hadn't gotten more than a hello in before the Latina retreated to her room to continue studying for a big exam. 

"Hey, you said a song involving rap and hip hop. You didn't specify the subject," Lexa reminded him. 

Bellamy rolled his eyes at her. "Fine, you win. I owe you a favor now."

Lexa grinned and cheered from her spot on the bean bag. "I told you so."

"Yeah, yeah," he said, picking up the guitar and strumming a little. "Um, can I talk to you about something?"

Lexa quirked a brow at him. "What about?"

"I mean, it's probably none of my business, and I wasn't, like, snooping around or anything, but Clarke, Raven and I were at this restaurant the other day, and the two of them went to the bathroom together, and I was a little short on cash, so I texted them to see if I could borrow some. Raven's bag was with her, but Clarke had left hers at the table and said that I could borrow a five to cover my part of the bill."

Bellamy paused, and fiddled with the guitar a little before continuing. 

"So, I look through her bag and take out a five, but I think I saw something I wasn't supposed to," he said quietly. "There were anxiety pills in there. Like, a severe prescription."

Lexa drew her lips into a thin line. "What's your question, Bellamy?"

"Does Clarke have anxiety?" Bellamy asked. "I'm not going to tell anyone."

"Yeah," Lexa answered. "We both do."

"Oh," Bellamy said. There was a moment of awkward silence, at least on Bellamy's end. 

"You can ask, you know," Lexa told him. "If I didn't want to talk, I would've named a bullshit excuse and ditched practice."

"I just didn't want to offend you or anything," Bellamy said.

"I'm not going to be offended," Lexa promised. "I mean, yeah, Clarke and I don't send out mass texts to our friend groups about our pills, but we won't lie if you ask us. It's not a thing to be ashamed of, but it's definitely not a thing that we want broadcasted everywhere."

"How long have you guys been taking the pills?" Bellamy asked, hugging the guitar as he gave Lexa his full attention. 

"Clarke and I take different pills, but she started taking hers around sophomore year because of all the stress she was dealing with in school and with her mom's position and all. There was a lot of pressure on her, and her mom's PR agent was a dick who fed her a bunch of crap about how she should live her life, so she made huge changes to her lifestyle. Her parents found out and fired his ass, but the impact of that stuck with Clarke."

"But she drinks a lot. Doesn't that just cancel out what the meds are supposed to do?"

"Clarke doesn't take hers everyday," Lexa told him. "It's a little problematic, but it's because she wants to feel. I take mine everyday, or almost everyday and the results terrify her. The meds make you really calm."

"Is that why you look so..."

"Emotionless?" Lexa answered for him, with a small smirk. "Yeah, basically."

"Do you guys have the same prescription?" Bellamy asked.

"No, Clarke's meds don't work for me. I have other kinds I need to take, too, and the properties kind of clash, which is why I have the brand that I have."

"How many pills do you take in a day?"

"Three."

Bellamy's eyes widened. "All for anxiety?"

"No, one for anxiety, two for depression," Lexa told him. "Don't be surprised at the number. There's patients who take, like, ten or fifteen on the daily for their medical conditions."

"You're depressed?" Bellamy asked, not able to believe it.

"Yeah, I've been taking meds for it since I was fourteen."

" _Fourteen_?" 

"Yep," Lexa confirmed, leaning over to grab her songwriting notebook from her bag. 

"Why?" The words flew out of Bellamy's mouth before he could stop himself. "Shit, sorry. That's going too far."

"If I didn't find you trustworthy, I wouldn't answer this question, but you should be more careful if you talk to other people who suffer from mental illness," Lexa warned him. "To be honest, I don't know. My life is great. I don't have much to complain about, but the depression crept up onto me. You don't necessarily need to be in a crappy situation to be depressed. I don't have abusive parents. I'm not poor. I have friends and stuff that I'm good at. I'm doing in school, but I'm still depressed."

Bellamy pursed his lips at her words. "I'm sorry."

"Why? You didn't cause this."

"Still. I just wish that everyone was happy."

Lexa shrugged her shoulders, then opened her notebook. "Anyway, back to the songs. I took your idea of mixing genres, and I wrote a few songs. I think this might fit the band more. A lot of these songs are piano heavy, but not all of them have rap in it."

 

 

 

Lexa raised a brow at Clarke, who was on the floor in the middle of their dorm. "Um, what is that?"

"A camera," Clarke answered, messing around with a few dials before lifting it up to take a picture of Lexa.

"I can see that," Lexa commented, moving to drop her stuff on her desk. "A better question would be why do you have it?"

"There's this photographer on set for the movie, and we started talking about her photography and stuff," Clarke told Lexa, snapping a few more photos of the brunette. "She let me mess around with her camera and taught me stuff about aperture, shutter speed, and ISO, so I went out and bought a camera and a few lenses."

"So, this is a new hobby?"

"Yep," Clarke confirmed with a grin, pulling the camera down from her face. "How was band practice today?"

"Good," Lexa told her. "Classes?"

Clarke scrunched her nose at that. "Meh. I got bored and started doodling. I block out half of what he says, anyway."

"Clarke," Lexa sighed. 

"Lex, if you had him, you'd be doing the same, trust me. He has one of those monotone voices that makes you want to go to sleep," Clarke informed her. "By the way, are we going to fly back to DC for Thanksgiving?"

"Clarke, Halloween is next week, and you're already thinking about Thanksgiving?"

"Well, yeah. I need to have an excuse planned ahead. If we're there, my mom and I are going to take a stupid photo to make her look good, and then she'll ditch dinner to continue her campaign planning."

"Is she seriously going to run for president?" Lexa asked.

"Hell if I care," Clarke shrugged. "But are we or aren't we?"

"I'll call my parents and see, but probably not. I think my dad's cousin is hosting this year, and he's all the way up in Maine."

"Yes," Clarke said, fist-pumping the air. "There's this seafood place two miles from here that I've been meaning to try, and Thanksgiving is the perfect time for that."

"Won't they be closed on Thanksgiving?"

"Shit, probably. Whatever. We can order it a day early or late and get pizza or Chinese on Thanksgiving," Clarke shrugged. "Your gig is still on for Thursday, right?"

"Yeah, as far as I know," Lexa said. "I don't think they should expect any new material from the band, though. If they decide to hire us, we're probably just stick to covering songs."

Clarke furrowed her brows in confusion. "Why?"

"Well, you know that challenge that Bellamy came up with when us three and Octavia were at brunch a week ago?"

"The one with the rap against hip hop thing, right?"

"Yep. I did what he asked me to and wrote a song about cheese, which I know sounds weird, but I won, and that was what really mattered at the end of the day," Lexa told her. "Anyway, that writing process made me rethink the songs for the band. Here was a little too pop for our image and we've been covering a lot of rock, so it made sense to write songs that combined rock and rap."

"That's...interesting," Clarke commented, not sure on how she should feel about this. "You got anything that I can listen to?"

"There's only one song that I've finished so far, and coincidentally, it's the one without any rap in it," Lexa told her.

"What's it called?"

"Screen," Lexa told her, moving to grab the keyboard and ukulele stored in her closet. She grabbed a small box and used it as a stand for her keyboard, then grabbed her notebook from her bag and flipped to the page with the lyrics. "I'll need you to play a few notes, if you don't mind. The song will sound so much better with both instruments."

After fiddling with the keyboard settings, Lexa showed the chords to Clarke, who was able to obviously grasp it quickly. Lexa tuned the ukulele before signaling Clarke to start.  

"I do not know why I would go  
In front of you and hide my soul  
'Cause you're the only one who knows it,  
Yeah, you're the only one who knows it  
  
And I will hide behind my pride  
Don't know why I think I could lie  
'Cause there's a screen on my chest  
Yeah, there's a screen on my chest."

Lexa nervously wet her lips before singing the next part. 

"I'm standing in front of you  
I'm standing in front of you  
I'm trying to be so cool  
Everything together trying to be so cool

I'm standing in front of you  
I'm standing in front of you  
I'm trying to be so cool  
Everything together trying to be so cool."

Lexa nervously glanced up at Clarke, who was smiling at the performance, which gave her the courage to continue.

"I can't see past my own nose, I'm seeing everything in slo-mo  
Look out below crashing down to the ground just like a vertical locomotive  
That's a train. Am I painting the picture that's in my brain?  
A train from the sky, locomotive, my motives are insane  
My flow's not great, OK, I conversate with people  
Who know if I flow on a song I'll get no radio play  
While you're doing fine, there's some people and I  
Who have a really tough time getting through this life  
So excuse us while we sing to the sky.

"I'm standing in front of you  
I'm standing in front of you  
I'm trying to be so cool  
Everything together trying to be so cool

I'm standing in front of you  
I'm standing in front of you  
I'm trying to be so cool  
Everything together trying to be so cool."

When Lexa stopped, it took Clarke a few seconds to realize that might have been the end of the song. "That's it?"

"There's a little bit more, but you get the gist of it," Lexa said. "What do you think?"

"I like it, especially the lyrics about locomotives," Clarke said. "Can you say it again?"

"Look out below crashing down to the ground just like a vertical locomotive," Lexa said, not bothering to sing it. And then there's the one that goes: a train from the sky, locomotive, my motives are insane."

"I think that's a great play on words," Clarke said. "Your train of thought is a locomotive. And then you say your motives are insane, and that goes back to locomotive. Loco meaning crazy in Spanish, and motive as in motive. Locomotive, crazy motive. That's genius."

Lexa grinned. "You really think so?"

"Hell, yeah. If you guys are serious about the band and you about writing songs, you'll go far. Just remember to introduce me to Brendan Urie. And Harry Styles. And Tyson Ritter. And Rita Ora. And Cara Delevingne. And—"

"Clarke, just write these down and give me the list. I am _not_ going to be able to remember all of those people."

Clarke laughed and reached over to peck Lexa on the lips. "Let's take a picture."

"What?"

Clarke crawled across the floor to her desk, where she pulled out a Sun600 polaroid, ones they have sold since the 80s. 

"I thought you had a DSLR."

"Yeah, but Andy said it's better to learn from film. Plus, I've always wanted polaroids," Clarke said, crawling back to Lexa after opening the camera. She wrapped her arms around Lexa, held the camera up, and said, "Say cheese."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts on this chapter?


End file.
